I’ve always wanted to fuck someone in a public
fountain. That’s one of my life goals, a
bucket list item.
Babe, can you not be so mad at me?
If you’re having the shittiest day ever, just watch
Beyonce’s Super Bowl performance. I
promise you’ll feel better.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is on Netflix. Good day indeed.
Real musicians, when they play, people stop talking.
SCREENPLAY:
FADE IN:
EXT. DOWNTOWN - NIGHT
An old, beat up car pulls up to park in front of a dive bar.
INT. CAR - CONTINUOUS
AUGUST, male, mid 20s, finishes his CIGARETTE before tossing
it out the window.
BEKAH, his girlfriend, stares out the passenger window.
BEKAH
Babe, can you not be so mad at me?
Both of them gaze out of their respective windows.
AUGUST
I'm not, I just need to cool down.
BEKAH
Today is the worst.
AUGUST
If you're having the shittiest day
ever, just watch Beyonce's Super
Bowl performance. I promise you'll
feel better.
Bekah scoffs.
AUGUST
Hey, check out that fountain!
ANGLE ON
On the other side of the street is a massive public fountain.
It is illuminated by a wide spectrum of multicolored,
psychedelic lights.
INT. CAR - CONTINUOUS
August laughs to himself.
BEKAH
What?
AUGUST
I've always wanted to fuck someone
in a public fountain. That's one of
my life goals. A bucket list item.
Bekah is not amused.
AUGUST
Let's go inside.
INT. DIVE BAR - MOMENTS LATER
August and Bekah make their way through the crowd, DRINKS in
hand, to a STAGE where a band is finishing their set.
The crowd is unresponsive, too involved in their own
conversations.
AUGUST
Looks like tonight's a dud.
BEKAH
Real musicians, when they play, people
stop talking.
AUGUST
Agreed.
They finish their drinks and linger for a moment.
AUGUST
Want to get out of here and go watch
a movie at home?
BEKAH
Sure.
INT. APARTMENT - LATER
August and Bekah are snuggling on the couch, flipping through
their movie options on the TV.
AUGUST
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is on
Netflix! Good day, ideed.
Bekah rolls her eyes.
AUGUST
Or... we could watch something else.
August hands Bekah the remote.
BEKAH
How about we catch that Super Bowl
performance on YouTube?
AUGUST
Deal.
You did not need to weave every phrase into the script. You did manage to do it in a creative way, though the lines feel forced into position rather than flowing with a natural rhythm. You could have gotten a stronger script by focusing on one phrase.
ReplyDelete